She got the "Stupid" part right

I somehow ended up with a copy of Stupid and Contagious, and, against my better judgment, read it. That lame neo-Coupland chick-lit faux-hipster tripe made me want to drive a spike through my head. I kept hoping that it would get good; that something would happen; but, no.

The characters were shallow collections of odd names and quirky behaviours. (Her name's Heaven, she's got all these obnoxious OCD-like tics, she's obsessed with getting married! He's a big pussy, but he's cool because he works in the music industry!) The back & forth narration switching reminded me of the lame-ass Babysitter Club books I read when I was in elementary school. Seriously, what the fuck? The pop culture references sprinkled throughout seemed like a pathetic attempt to appeal to a younger audience. Yes: Tab, Funnyuns, Starbucks, Nirvana. Damn, you're edgy.

Look, if you want an amusing discourse on pop culture minutiae, strike up a conversation with your 20-something friends/neighbours/coworkers. I imagine they'll also reveal themselves to have weird quirks as well as actual personalities. Just last week I found myself drawn into a 30 minute discussion about pudding pops what was infinitely more intelligent and entertaining than any aspect of this book.

I still wonder if I was just reading it wrong. While any review or mention of this suggests that it's straightforward chick-lit, I wonder if it wasn't supposed to be satirical. The stupid characters, the wacky narration, and everything else that's horribly wrong would make sense. It still wouldn't make it a good book, though.

What really brings out the hate for me was the main character. I absolutely loathe female characters who feel a compelling need to be married by age X. I hate it when actual character development is given up in favour of throwing together a collection of crazy quirks. And, I can't stand it when I'm expected to root for obnoxious, vapid, narcissists.

I left my copy on the $1 table at a used book store, but now I wish I had kept it so I could set it on fire.

According to Amazon, the author has a new book due out this year. It appears to be more of the same. If there's any justice in this world, she'll do a reading/signing near me, and I'll get to punch her in the face for wasting my time.